Miscarriage...a Most Un-Gracious Goodbye

by Jill Francis on March 25th, 2017

"Miscarriage"...a word we whisper as we look away or gaze at our feet;  as though it implies something shameful or dirty or something not to be discussed in "polite company".  A word that rarely affords the sympathy it should convey to the sufferer, for we deem the loss minimal and expect them to "move on".  A word we need to associate with loss.  Pain.  Grief.  And healing.  

We rarely hear from men on the topic of miscarriage, but thanks to a young father, brave enough to share, today we will.  This is Jared's tribute to the twins he and his wife lost to miscarriage.  Babies.  Lost.  
Thank you, Jared

​Dear Precious Little Ones,

Your mother has the most beautiful eyes. Your sweet brother and sister were blessed with those same eyes. With every grieving teardrop that has fallen from those eyes, my heart has been broken.

I had dreamed of you for years, and just those thoughts alone filled me with such wondrous joy! From the exciting moment you two were conceived, you were a part of our family, and we adored you and loved you dearly. Both of you were alive, and you already had such beautiful and wonderfully unique souls!

You are fraternal twins, so we wondered if you would both be boys, girls, or one of each. We talked to you, we sang to you, we prayed about you, we prayed with you, and we imagined with such excitement what amazing plans were in store for you. You two were fearfully and wonderfully made, and I praise God for the short time that I shared with you as your father while your mother carried you. Both then and now, I think about you every moment of every day.

I admit that my heart feels crippled by the devastating agony of your loss. It feels like I was robbed of not one but two whole lifetimes of joy. I have wailed in misery of the void left behind by your early deaths, and I have screamed in anger of the injustice felt. For the rest of my life, you two will be constantly with me in my mind yet painfully beyond my reach in every other way. Oh, how much I long to hold you and kiss you just one time!

Even more so, nothing crushes my spirit more than witnessing the torment that my wife and best friend continues to endure. Your mother is such a beautiful, strong, amazing, miraculous woman, and it frightens me to see her so broken. I cannot even begin to fathom what she has gone through and has yet to go through as she mourns the loss of her two precious babies.

Still, God is good. He loves us, and He continues to comfort our broken hearts. It is such a blessing that you two were born perfect into an eternal paradise in His awesome and glorious presence. I am thankful that neither of you will ever have to experience pain of any kind.

I cannot wait to one day meet you in heaven. I know you two will be easy to find: you'll be the most beautiful and perfect among all of the angels, and you will have your mother's eyes.

Today would have been your due date. You both will forever be on our minds and in our hearts. We miss you more than you can imagine, and we love you more than words can say. We will always cherish the precious memory of you both. Happy Birthday, my twins, my little perfect angels!

- Your Loving Father



Posted in not categorized    Tagged with Miscarriage, Loss, Babies, Twins


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